It's a GAD GAD World
Saturday, May 06, 2006
OK, back to my story...

I haven't gone off meds completely. I absolutely MUST be functional for work, and I am working now, so I still took some Namenda before work every morning. But I dropped down to the lowest dosage, 5 mgs. And I still popped an occasional benzo when I felt the need. But no sleep aids, due to the alcohol I've been drinking every night.

Surprisingly, it hasn't been that bad. Monday & Tuesday were a little rough, but I've been managing. Sleep has been horrible. I've been lucky to get 4 hours a night. Last night I gorged myself on pizza & ended up napping for 90 minutes. Never got around to doing the drinking ritual because I was too damn sleepy to turn on the computer to play music.

Got up around 7:30 this morning, then I did laundry. Now I'm writing. And I'll probably continue to write until dinnertime. Other than that, I probably won't do anything special today.

And that's getting more and more OK. It used to really bother me that no one remembered me on holidays & special days, but as the years go by things like that become less & less important. I suppose some small part of me will always wonder why I'm not important to anyone in the world, but I'm starting to realize that not being important ISN'T that important.

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