It's a GAD GAD World
Friday, January 27, 2012
There's something I want to know. And I know I don't have too many people who follow this blog, but I'm asking here because I'm too ashamed to admit that I don't know the answer.

If you're in the NYC area you might have heard that there's a news personality who's in a bit of hot water. (And no, it's not the Hot Reporter I've mentioned in previous posts. Completely different person.) Seems that about 3 months ago Newsguy met a woman on the street. They went into a bar, had a few drinks, then they headed to the office where she works & had sex. The woman is now claiming that it wasn't consensual, that it was rape.

Here's what I want to know. And I'm sorry I have to ask this, because I really don't know. How do two complete strangers meet on the street and end up having sex with each other? Please understand that I am not condemning people who do this. Whatever two consenting adults choose to do, so long as they don't hurt each other or anyone else, is up to them. I just want to know how people can have sex with people they barely know.

I *want* to have sex. Even though it scares me to death, I truly want it. But I want it to be with someone I know. Someone I feel comfortable and safe with. Someone who fits me like my favorite pair of jeans or a warm cuddly sweater.

And just as I typed that last sentence a song by Cute Brother popped up on my Realplayer. Crap.

Is that my problem? That I expect too much before jumping into bed? Not that anyone's wanted me to jump in their bed. You might think that's hypocritical after my cyberfling with Mr. Married. But you have to understand that I've known Mr. Married since I was a teenager. I thought I'd be safe with him. I thought I could trust him. Obviously I was wrong.

My New Boss hates me. I don't want to go into it. But it's not a question of whether she's going to fire me, it's a question of when. It's getting late and my internet is crapping out, so I'm going to post before I lose this forever.

If you have an answer for me I'd really like to hear it.

There is no short answer Pat. These two are obviously either in their 20's or emotionally stunted. He's obviously just a selfish guy who's found a girl willing to just give it away and went for it. She obviously has NO self esteem and was soooo excited to have the opportunity to be noticed by a guy who's ON TV!! that she thought she'd get his attention better naked than with her own personality and merits. When that didn't keep his attention for more than the 3 minutes it took him to get his end away she cried foul and tried the sympathy card in the media. (just guessing). Anywho I love what you said about how you want things to be with your ideal partner...eventually... notice I said eventually? In most cases, even when you meet your soulmate, the scenario you describe as your ideal is where you find yourself AFTER the 'getting to know you', AFTER 'exposing the real you, flaws, warts and all' and being accepted anyway, AFTER discovering the 'real him, flaws, warts and all' and accepting him anyway. That's where you END UP. It doesn't start out that way. First time sex is almost always SCARY!! Even if he's been your best friend for years. Even if it's just 'sex', let alone the first time you 'make love' with your soulmate. Believe me. No-one (no matter how much they lie about it) starts out in that fulfilling self assured place. It's a journey and it takes time and effort and I for one believe you will get there Pat. Honest. You just have to start somewhere. With a real live just to work out who!
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