It's a GAD GAD World
Sunday, July 22, 2012
There was a staff meeting on Thursday. Boss says if we don't shape up we could all be in danger of losing our jobs.

On Friday I woke up to the news of the Batman shooting. Cute Brother lives near Denver & he's a comic geek. I absolutely wouldn't put it past him to go to a Batman premiere. I spent several tense hours before I heard from him. I'm glad he's ok, but it sucks not to be able to tell him just how worried I was and how glad I was to hear from him. As Jodee Blanco wrote, the hardest part of being an outcast isn't the love you don't receive. It's the love you're not allowed to give.

Worried about what an impending job loss would do to my surgery plans, I spoke with a couple of people. They both told me to get the surgery on the books asap, because there's no way HR would fire me if they knew I needed surgery.

Life is so scary. There's so much in my life and in the world that could hurt me. I'd give anything to crawl into someone's arms and get a hug. I don't even remember the last time anyone hugged me. I'm so tired of having to do everything alone and having no one to lean on. This is why I don't want to live anymore. It's just so hard.

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